A Wish Gone Wrong

Okay everyone! In an attempt to liven up the forums *Saw voice* Lets play a game.
The rules are simple... you stay ali- dammit im not jigsaw.
Okay
As the title says, its like a wish gone wrong. heres the example..

Me: I wish I was on a boat.

You: You were on a boat, but the boat sank.
You: I wish I could rule the world.

Other guy: You ruled the world... full of hairy men.
Other guy: I wish I could live forever.

Andd SO ON!!!!!!!!! Heres my starting.

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I wish I could blow up my school.

And have it blow up in your face.
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I wish I had a magical unicorn~!

But that computer was puke green, shaped like a peanut, and clashed with EVERYTHING.

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I SO WISH I HAD WATERMELON RIGHT NOW.

You had a watermelon... BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY A MAN EATING WATERMELON
~
I wish...I had a billion dollarzz

Granted but the noobs get a gun that vaporizes you.

I wish spottedfire would stop reading a book for once in her life

granted but then everyone wants it and you dont get a chance to play

I wish i had a shotgun

Granted, but it backfires in your face and then some gangster steals it.
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I wish I had my cat right now ;-;

granted, but your cat explodes while you're in the bathrm
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i wish i had a popsicle

granted, i walk over w\ my poopsicle and watch the fabric cut itself, but it turns haywire and cuts ure pants off...
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i wish i didnt have a poopsicle...

wish granted Birth By Sleep *watever that is* comes out, but you are not alowed to see it...if its a movie.....

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i wish waters would wear stretchy pants then...

granted. but you movie went so fast that all you could see was your face.
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i wish i could see you...

I love these things!
~:~:~

Granted But shes so ugly that your now blind.
~:~:~

I wish I had some cheesecake

Granted, but it takes like rats and puke.
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I WISH MY AMV WAS FINISHED.

Ohh what is this amv about?
~:~:~
Anyway, Granted but while in the middle of saving your comp freezes and you have to start all over.
~:~:~

I wish my mom would let me get a new DS D:

It's Jungle Emperor Leo - Little Wonders
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Granted, but it doesn't work and it explodes, destroying whatever game you had in it.
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I wish I didn't have to go to FRICKIN DANCE CLASS. -cringe-

granted. but now you haf to go to tango class...which is sorta lik dancing...but oh well..
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i wish samantha jones would die...

Granted, but then she is revived and comes back to life.
~:~:~

I wish my sister didnt drop my phone in a dirty lake cause now it squeaks D:

granted. ure sister drops it in a clean lake and now it zaps you
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i wish i wasnt sick...

Waters wear stretchy pants, but you had to go to yoga classes with her.
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I wish I could walk on water.